The Parable of the One-Legged Man

"Saying 'I won't leave you' does not necessarily mean sticking with the person forever. It just means you'll never leave that person alone."

I said texted this to Karla in our International Political Economy this morning. See what happens when your academic problem and inconsistent social relationships decided to pester your life? Tsk. There has been a major misunderstanding between Ed and moi. Hah, and he calls himself my bestfriend. Boys. Tsk. No matter how you spoon-feed them with your ideas, they'll never be able to get you. Girls and GAYS are easier task. I remember what Ate Marj has once said,

"The sheer number of gay people are proof of a higher state of evolution. The gays exhibit decidedly feminine characteristics, which indicates that they are evolving to the more advanced sex of the human species. Higher intelligence leads to a certain feminization because it's the more advanced thing to do.

Seriously, everyone starts in life as female, it's the default sex. Only when your teeny-weeny Y chromosome starts secreting androgens as a fetus do you turn male."

Hah! I see raised eyebrows. I don't care, it's Women Empowerment Month anyway

So back to the topic, Karla said that it isn't anybody's job to secure that nobody is alone.


Yes, I concede to that. But given the context that we are talking about the concept of friendship. Friendship is the cementing of two souls, as they say. Camaraderie. So basically what does that mean? I remember how I use to preach Paola about the One-Legged Man: my analogy of friendship.

We are all trekking our own roads in life. Basically, everybody is walking on one leg. We need the help of someone so as we can move forward. We call this someone, a friend. We stick together through thick and thin. Without the other, the other may never make it. On some parts of the road, we switch partners. But, the essence is that we still need someone in order to survive.

Yes, other people may argue with this concept as juxtaposed to the idea of forlornness (as to the case of the loners). But then again, I say, that friendship is not only limited to creations of the same specie as yours. I certainly believe that these "loners" had at least one minute in their lives wherein they yearned for company. Or maybe they already found it. Establishment of friendship is not merely allocated for individuals. Everybody has a best friend. Some see their pets as their best bud. Others have a certain hobby to which they pour their hearts out. And usually, when nothing else is left, people cling to their pride as a last resort. Anything that would keep them hanging on to their lives no matter how bumpy the course may be. So basically, everybody in the world is in constant need of company. Company, as defined not with the people you hang out with, but with something you do or what wherein you feel that you belong.

So, in this case, it is clear that nobody wants to be alone. Being alone is not boxed in to the idea of being anti-social. Being alone is referred here as being left with the feeling of emptiness and despair. So, how does this apply to friendship?

You see, in friendship, there is this invisible bond that ties two (or more) souls. This bond is an affirmation that whatever may happen, nobody will leave anybody. It is an assurance that when you chose this person to be with you in your journey, you subconsciously expect that he/she will not leave you in the middle of the battle. Oh, it would not be the end of the world for you, but the feeling of being left behind by someone you trusted to be with you until you reach the next stop is like being a one-legged man dropped by another one in the middle of a race. You can crawl your way to the finish line but the journey will never be easy.

What if there isn't any promises? Then there is no accountability between the two person? I say, there is. When you enter a relationship (i.e. friendship), there is this unspoken agreement between both of you. And usually these unspoken agreements are the things that hurt the most when broken. As the vow isn't bounded by ink and paper, you sign it with your trust. And with that, you gamble your emotional stability with it. Friends are different from acquaintances. Once you make someone your friend, there is this implicit promise that you will never leave each other.

But then again, one can't always be there for anybody. That is true. But as a friend, or a person who understands the value of subjectivity, isn't it better if you secure that the person will never be alone? Let's take the one-legged man's case again here.

Let's say Person A does not want to be with Person B anymore as they go through the race, Person A should not, then and there, leave Person B all by himself. The least that Person A can do is look for someone who can be with Person B along the way. If Person A still values the trust vested by Person B upon him, he should be responsible in looking for someone who could fulfill his task in case he does not feel fit to do it anymore.
Friendship does not require sticking with the person until the end even if you don't want to. It means assuring that person, that even if you will not be on his side, he will never be left alone.

This post is for all the broken friendships that marked the face of the earth. This is for the sisters who had their worst argument over a borrowed shirt. This is for the brothers who forgot their being because of sibling rivalry. This is for the lovers who quarreled over the phone because of some silly third-party. This is for the past friends who up to now still wishes to bring back the pieces but never did had the chance and the strength. This is for the best friends who forgot that comfortability should never be overlooked. This is for everyone.

This is for my friends who think that I already forgot them. This is for my bestfriend whom I wish would understand this. This is for my current friends who give meaning to my otherwise meta-pessimist life. This is for the Neurotic Saglet Asylum.

PE is history. PE Night is over and done with. Remember the night that started it all? Do you remember how we clarified this pact? That we will be together? It is a vicious cycle. Pain and healing. ACT, do not just react. Respond. Make the first move. We are all affected. After all, we know we love each other. Please. Remember Crazy Frog? Curlytops? Toothbrush? 3ms? 1R, S, S1, S2? NOBODY IS LEAVING ANYBODY. When you lost it all, your pride is the only thing left with you. But I say, nothing has been lost as of now. Nothing WILL be lost. The last thing I expect is for this friendship, this world, to fall apart.

There's still time. :)